Men Are Happier

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Top Wop
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Men Are Happier

Post by Top Wop »

Men Are Happier

Men are just simply happier people, and here is why...

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President. You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car Mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conservations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all of your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe even decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can \"do\" your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier!
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Krom
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Post by Krom »

Amusing but doesnt really deserve much more then a \"Heh!\".
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Hattrick
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Post by Hattrick »

*golf clap*
here here

:P
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Topher
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Post by Topher »

People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
I beg to differ, I get freakin' groped all the time. \"Hey Chris, you have great pecs!!\"

Yay.
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DarkFlameWolf
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Post by DarkFlameWolf »

*fondles Topher*
You got great pecs! :D
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Mobius
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Post by Mobius »

FYI: I have 23 pairs of shoes. 17 pairs are Nikes. 14 of those are Shox. :)
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Post by Tyranny »

Mobius wrote:FYI: I have 23 pairs of shoes. 17 pairs are Nikes. 14 of those are Shox. :)
wow :roll:
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Money!
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Post by Money! »

That was great.
Birdseye wrote:It's never over
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Battlebot
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Post by Battlebot »

Topher wrote:
People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
I beg to differ, I get freakin' groped all the time. "Hey Chris, you have great pecs!!"

Yay.
thats because youre a stripper...
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Post by Unix »

Mobius wrote:FYI: I have 23 pairs of shoes. 17 pairs are Nikes. 14 of those are Shox. :)
FYI: Your testosterone level is dangerously low.
-Unix
My Music
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Topher
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Post by Topher »

Battlebot wrote:thats because youre a stripper...
If by stripper you mean Software Engineer, then yes.
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Post by Isaac »

+add
Can argue about poptart flavors for an hour.
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Sirius
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Post by Sirius »

As long as I have at least one pair of shoes of a given sort that I can actually wear, I don't mind. :)

Sucks when some of them start to fall apart though.
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Floyd
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Post by Floyd »

word. superglue works for a few days though ;)
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Isaac
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Post by Isaac »

no way. jb weld is what you want for that. superglue breaks like week plastick
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Post by Kiran »

Top Wop you forgot \"Men don't have many choices about clothes... they just pick them out of the closet\" :P
Most of us women struggle with what to wear to work or for the day because we have so many more choices in clothes. While I go through 3 or 4 outfits in 30 minutes, my boyfriend goes through only one in 5 seconds (Unless he asked me which shirt he should wear... then it takes a lot longer;) ).
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Top Wop
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Post by Top Wop »

Kiran wrote:Top Wop you forgot "Men don't have many choices about clothes... they just pick them out of the closet" :P
Most of us women struggle with what to wear to work or for the day because we have so many more choices in clothes. While I go through 3 or 4 outfits in 30 minutes, my boyfriend goes through only one in 5 seconds (Unless he asked me which shirt he should wear... then it takes a lot longer;) ).
Heh! True. I just grab what's on top in my wardrobe and put it on. Whatever colored pants or shirt happens to be on top of the pile, thats the color for the day.
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Post by TIGERassault »

Top Wop wrote:Heh! True. I just grab what's on top in my wardrobe and put it on. Whatever colored pants or shirt happens to be on top of the pile, thats the color for the day.
Not me.
I chose to have all of my clothes as neutral colours.
Mostly because it hides the fact that I have no fashion sense whatsoever.
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roid
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Post by roid »

bleh, this list makes me feel lacking as a man.
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